In the worst ways...

[Plain Old Jane]

It was August 18 when she first came over to my house, she was the first person I've ever spent the night with. Not in the way your thinking, and I am still a virgin, but I digress. She came over and we talked and watched a classic, "The Lost Boys." A vamp movie as she has a prediliction toward such things. My first ambulance call was around 7pm, I went out and came back within an hour, we were closer by then, I was determined to let her know I was interested in her, but right before I could make my move, tones rang out again, and yet another person in my sorry town stubbed their toe and needed my help. So out and back in an hour. This time I came back and pecked her forehead before I sat down to finish watching the movie. The third tone of the night rang out at 10 pm, and I full on kissed her, right outta left field, before I left, and I said psuedo-romantically, "I'll... be right... back." and ran out to treat and care for the ill and critically injured. When I came back we were intertwined for nearly twelve straight hours in a state of continuous foreplay.

We've been together for three and a half months, and for three of those months, we've been inseperable, constantly having to remove ourselves from the room to go relieve our... minds... but seemingly, in the last two weeks, she's completely ignored me. I guess I should have seen it coming with her lack of interest in me over our last two or three dates, even her outright insult of me (your being a jackass! just kidding!) which I attributed to her... monthly visit from aunt flo... (I have two aunt flo's as it happens, really.)

In our time together, I've been rather surprised at certain... happenings... When she said that famous three word phrase at only two weeks into our relationship. When she admitted to me once that she'd actually... well lets just say, if we had gotten intimate, I'd never be able to donate blood again... okay, I'll say it, she admitted to me once that she'd once wanted to know what it was like to be a prostitute, so she did with a friend, some rather... heinous acts... granted, before we started dating... but fuck, this was 2 months in, this is like... 2nd date, 3rd date kind of information... These things and more, but they're really more of a personal perspective thing and immaterial, suffice to say, she's had certain quirks that I couldnt quite figure out.

But never in our relationship did I tell her she was a bad person, or that I never meant anything that I said, or that she was anything less than the most deserving of happiness... and to some degree I still believe that... but...

Like I said, in the past two weeks, she's pretty much ignored me, and not returned my calls nor made an attempt to contact me at all, and to date, I've only made two or three attempts to get a hold of her to no avail. Until I came home tonite about an hour ago and found a messege on my machine from one, "chuck."

"hey my names chuck, you prolly dont know me. I'm just calling to let you know that dawn aint witchyou no more. She's with me now, if I find out you called her, I'ma f*** you up." =click=

While this phone call has little to do with my 'issues', the breaking apart of the relationship may have been, as she has admitted it is somewhat akward(sp) and... well.. I agree, it is.

I guess I finally found all that high school drama that I missed out on, and quite frankly I feel betrayed somewhat. And while I dont blame her for not wanting to be with me, I do blame both her and 'chuck' for the way in which she did it. And I feel an emotion, I RARELY feel, "Rage."

Right now, maybe its the shock or the overwhelming sense of anger I'm feeling that only the sweet tendrils of estrogen(shut up) can hold back, but I feel like doing something very evil... something that all my years in urban vandalism and subterfuge can help with. Something that all my knowledge of human anatomy and pressure points can be useful for. Something that my wide network of friends in the local police, fire, and rescue force can help with. Something that my over analytical, and sometimes annoying, mind can pump out a diabolical stratagy for, a stratagy that once implimented would never ever get traced back to me. Something just plain... vengeful.

And I've been wondering since I started writing this

Is revenge something I... should do?

Is this something YOU would do?

[johnny]

revenge seems pretty silly.

besides, if you do anything stupid you're probably going to regret it.

[Mr Biglesworth]

It most certainly is not something I would do.
So yes, I understand that you are physiologically and psychologically becoming a much more emotional person. Seriously, good luck with that. Emotions are great, the color out the half of life many men miss out on. But they're also dangerous if not held in check, as Plato argued, by reason. Emotions are ends in themselves, right? If you feel rage, you act on it, not for any particular end but because you feel rage. Alright, fine, it's good to act on emotions... sometimes. But Jepperel, you're a rather spiritual person, you pride yourself on compassion, last I heard you identified yourself with Buddhism. I would expect you to be able to see this not as a personal attack on you, but something that, well... unfortunately 'happens', and alot of humans get hurt in the process - just like the rest of life. If you know what she's been through and feel love for her, you'll savor that bitter sting of an insensitive and cruel rejection, and move along. Johnny's right, once the rage has subsided, you would regret it.

Kill the bitch.

[Plain Old Jane]

well, actually I decided around 6 am, after poring over every speck on information I come up with on self defense, and the consensus is... avoid a fight altogether. so thats what I'll do. I mean, yea, I felt betrayed in the worst possible way another human being can hurt another, and I still do, and its gonna sting for a long time... but pretty much anyone could cream me in a fight, and there is a chance his thug ass would get pent up over my ambiguous qualities and might not stop when I go limp. I might end up like Gwen Arujuo, who was beaten to death with a shovel over the course of 9 hours. And that would not benefit my agenda in this world.

I am however sated by the fact that, unless she found another non-thug person as supportive as I am, she has absolutely no chance of rising up out of the shit hole she calls a life. Same goes for chuck too, people like that only end up in prison, or the aim of an ambulance call. And that makes me feel better. As much love and faith I want to place in her, I just dont have it in me... Last night I didnt sleep because I felt so threatened, and if it comes up again, I'll be going through the legal channels, however even that is not in my best interests, so...

it is my aim to avoid confrontation as much as possible until that becomes impossible, and if push comes to shove, he'll find a knife planted just to the left of the all important 1 percent.

[Mr Biglesworth]

Wow Jep, I'm sorry to hear you've been hurt so badly here. I think some residual bitterness dripped off your post onto the copyright notice at the bottom of the page.
Seriously, I don't want to underplay how much that must hurt. I hope you find whatever it is that (peacefully) soothes your sores. Love ya, man!

[raublekick]

Sadly, I haven't felt the sting of a broken up relationship in about 6 years. And that was a highschool relationship that was based on nothing other than fooling around. The breakup there was as simple as her telling me after school one day that she thought we should break up. What came out of my mouth was along the lines of "Ok, that's fine", but what was in my mind was "Wow, you're a dumb bitch. I'm glad". It actually did hurt, just the fact of being rejected like that, but man, I really didn't like her all that much.

I don't really know what that story has to do with anything, I guess it just shows that there are bigger losers than you out there (i.e. myself).

Personally I would just try to forget about it and move on. You aren't getting her back. If she wanted to be with you you wouldn't have gotten a phone call like that. As harsh as that might sound, the sooner you understand that the sooner you can heal.

[Mr Biglesworth]

Don't worry raublekick (raublekick... what the hell IS that?!?), you'll be destroyed emotionally in due time. You just need to find the right girl :wink:

I'm afraid to say that I've destroyed 1 girl emotionally and, "in a way" broke another girls heart in the last 6 months. Mayhaps i'll share these stories with you all another day, but it was difficult to realize how much pain I'm capable of inflicting. God, I wish I was capable of more unemotional relationships, so there wouldn't be such a risk of pain. But no, of course I don't really mean that.
On the other hand, I'm seeing a hottie here at university, she's an absolute sweetheart, and we have a great time together. It was her 19th birthday last night... *ahem* so far, i've gone to the strip club with 100% of my (ex)girlfriends on their 19th birthday (that's 2 so far). I just need to lure the other 2 out when they turn 19.

[raublekick]

Zach was so kind as to post a bad picture of me on another forum, and that was quickly photoshopped by another member into this:



now, since my last name (and usual internet name) resembles "robble" (rauble) I was henceforth dubbed "Rauble". People started referring to me as the Hamburglar, and many photos were morphed into me being the Hamburglar. Then another dude photoshopped this:



It's a sprite of Sabin from FF6, and somehow someone deemed it the Rauble Kick, some sort of special move for me, I guess. Me and Aaron Burke of the Minibosses had a weird bout at MAGfest where he'd get into a kicking position and yell "RAUBLE KICK!" and then we would kick at each other. Then he'd yell "AGAIN!" and we did it over and over, and I was fucking confused, let me tell you (I was at about 36 hours without sleep, and pretty stoned as well).

Man, if I wasn't completely bored and pretty stoned to boot, I wouldn't have typed all that.[/list]

[Mr Biglesworth]

hahaha, you probably wouldn't have written[/list]too!

[Plain Old Jane]

Originally Posted by raublekick

Personally I would just try to forget about it and move on. You aren't getting her back. If she wanted to be with you you wouldn't have gotten a phone call like that. As harsh as that might sound, the sooner you understand that the sooner you can heal.

I dont want her back, not after this, I just want her to experience the same pain she's inflicting on me, is THAT SO MUCH TO ASK!!??!?!??!?!?!?!/1/128y8tg32

[thecreeper]

Honestly, I think as soon as I would have heard from "Chuck" I would have called right back, but I can't recommend doing such. I've let my anger and emotions get the best of me before, and as such, I've gotten in several physical fights because I don't do the smart thing and back off. Luckily, I'm not a small guy, and I can take care of myself, but I think it's wise you chose not to confront the guy and girl. You dont need a trip to the hospital on top of some heartbreak and betrayal.

it's really not a fair situation, i just hope you can get some piece of mind on it and move on.

[Plain Old Jane]

I've recieved some information that may mean this whole thing was a joke on one of her friends parts, but I've also recieved info that it may very well be true. I guess until I hear it from her, I should take this thing very seriously...

New Info: There is a 'chuck' in that circle of friends who was sent to jail not that long ago for beating up a cop, to the best of my sources intel, hes still there... but I'm not so sure. The person on my machine fits the profile of an "Eminem wannabe," at least from what I can tell...
Definitly high on my "not to fuck with" list... good thing I didnt do something bad... yet...

[Plain Old Jane]

omfg, I just found out why she dumpped meh!!! and I'm a lil pissed... But I also wanna throw up...

"and ill tell u why, kasz i always liked ya and thought u were nice.
she sed that she just got tired of ... well ... someone respecting her so much... she sed she needed to be treated like a whore again..."

wtf... okay, I need to slit my wrists, bbl....

[thecreeper]

Originally Posted by Gaz

"and ill tell u why, kasz i always liked ya and thought u were nice.
she sed that she just got tired of ... well ... someone respecting her so much... she sed she needed to be treated like a whore again..."

haha, i'm sorry, that may be the stupidest thing i've ever heard.

[Plain Old Jane]

considering the person, I can just easily believe it as think its BS... but its straight from her best friend, and her and I've been friends longer then i was dating the girl so, I'm inclined to believe. But if asked, I'll prolly still claim I dont know why she left me cuz that is a stupid answer.

also a quote from her best friend,
"she changes partners like underwear."
"nikki... DAWN DOESNT WEAR UNDERWEAR!"

[Stormy]

I suggest you sign her up for Neurocam.com. That should set her straight.

[Plain Old Jane]

... what is that?

::has been to the site, still confused::

[Stormy]

That is the mystery, my friend! That is the mystery.

(http://forums.interestingnonetheless....php?tid=19895)